The Great Ganesha

An important message to the fellow desi diaspora in the US

Are there times when you feel “less desi”? Do you say to yourself, “By leaving my home country, I have betrayed my culture, my values and most importantly, my mother.” Do you feel isolated? Like a traitor?

Well, stop worrying! We here, at The Great Ganesha, have the perfect solution for you! It will ensure that you are true to your roots without compromising your loyalties to your new home!

“Wow!” you say, “What’s this amazing panacea?”

I’ll tell you what it is, my friend. It’s the word: $latex Gachha^{TM}$.

“What?” you say, “What the hell are you talking about, you jackass?”

Yes, I am a jackass, but what I’m talking about is that the word combines Indian and American cultures!

“How?” you ask, incredulously.

Think about it – what does an American say instead of ok? He says, “Gotcha.” For instance, observe this dialogue between a boss and his employee.

Boss: So, as I was saying, we should run the TPS reports through Accounts Receiving and make sure that Bob in Marketing gets a copy. Did you get all that?

Employee: Gotcha.

Instead of suffering through the torment about what your friends will think or whether you will be able to look at yourself in the mirror if you say “Gotcha,” you don’t have to worry anymore.

Just say $latex Gachha^{TM}$.

It will make your boss happy (because it sounds like “Gotcha”) but it will also appease fellow desis waiting to pounce on you for betraying your true culture, because you’re saying achha, but with a ‘g’ tacked on at the beginning.

So when your fellow desis chide you about it after the meeting, fear not, you can tell them you were saying $latex Gachha^{TM}$.

What are you waiting for, man? Start using it now and never suffer from doubts about your Indian-ness again!

$latex Gachha^{TM}$ is a trademark of The Great Ganesha and cannot be used unless royalties are paid. Each use costs $1.99. Visa, Mastercard and Discover accepted. We are Paypal-friendly. The Great Ganesha disavows all liability ensuing from disaster which is a consequence of the use of the word. Side effects may include headache and nausea stemming from job-loss, never hearing from your mother again and an oily discharge in your stool. Please consult your therapist before using.

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!