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I am sure that, by now, everyone has heard about the Reader’s Digest survey that concluded that Bombay was the rudest city in the world. Bombayites are outraged and are defending themselves voraciously. I say: Why? We must be proud of our rudeness. We must shout: We’re rude, we’re crude, get used to it!
I consider myself a Bombay fanatic having spent the first 19 years of my life in that city. I was born and brought up there. Before I am anything else, I am a Bombayite. Not Indian, not 1.5 generation’er, not NRI and certainly not a Mumbai-ite (a Mumbaikar perhaps, but that’s for a different post). First and foremost, I am a Bombayite, THEN I apply all these other labels. So, it’s with great love and respect for the city that I write this.
First off: the so-called “survey” was conducted in the following way:
Two reporters — one woman and one man — fanned out across the city, homing in on neighborhoods where street life and retail shops thrive. They performed three experiments: “door tests” (would anyone hold one open for them?); “document drops” (who would help them retrieve a pile of “accidentally” dropped papers?); and “service tests” (which salesclerks would thank them for a purchase?).[link]
Look, these things are for when you’re in Middle-of-Heartland, USA. Having spent several years in Podunk, Wisconsin, I heard more than my fair share about how a “good Christian” should behave. In the Midwest, everyone holds the door open for you, everyone smiles at you and says hello, and everyone will thank you at the slightest provocation. But I say: that’s utterly hypocritical. I don’t need lip-service! I don’t need artificial smiles! Don’t I have anything better to do than to say hello to everyone who passes me on the street? Damn straight, I don’t! These are people who, behind their polite manners and quaint little storefronts, are as ambitious, greedy, hateful and discriminatory as anyone else and I’m talking from experience, especially regarding the discrimination part of it. They like to hide all of that beneath their cheerful and polite veneer and pretend that we are all “civilized”. Well, Gandhi once said that Western civilization would be a great idea. I concur. [As an aside, see Lars Von Trier's Dogville for an extreme example of what goes on in small-town America.]
Of course, I am not denying that I too am ambitious, greedy and hateful at times. And I hate to say it, but so are you. We all have a reptilian brain, after all. Except that I don’t hide it behind good manners. In Bombay, I was taught the hard way that if you are polite, you will be trampled over. Ever try taking the Virar fast from Churchgate? Ever been in the passport office? Ever try getting your driver’s license? Try being polite by saying your “please”s and “thank you”s and see how far you get.
And when things really come to a head - that’s when Bombayites’ true nature comes out. What happened during the floods? Bombayites the world over banded together to help out. I know so many (too many) anecdotes about people who took in and fed absolute strangers for days. Remember the riots? I never cease to be amazed at the humanity during these rough times. In times of crises, with which we are too familiar, we know how to react. We know how to help out. But we will not hold the door open for you, we will not say please and thank you, and we will not help you with your papers. Is that really such a big deal?
Ironically, New York, was ranked #1. New York, where ambition, greed and the desire for #1 takes priority over anything else. Well, I say, New York is getting soft. Bombay is becoming the next New York and this is the clearest sign. Ok, perhaps that’s a little overboard, but that’s the general tone of this post. Don’t like it? The hell with you!!
UPDATE: Reacting to a comment by Confused, and to be fair, I should add that the Digest listed the cities as categorized from “Most courteous” to “Least courteous” and not “Least rude” to “Most rude”. So, technically, Bombay is the “Least Courteous City in the World”. But that, in my opinion, is just a matter of semantics and political correctness on the Digest’s part.
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33 responses so far ↓
1 Lady Writer // Jun 22, 2006 at 1:53 am
Couldn’t agree with you more. I’ve lived there for 28 years, and no survey could change the fact that I love the city, and thoroughly respect its people. Every time they’be been put in a tough spot — after the riots, during the floods, etc. they’ve shown more courage, compassion, and humanity than most of us could imagine.
2 The Great Ganesha // Jun 22, 2006 at 7:45 am
glad we all agree on this. don’t think any bombayite in their right mind would say otherwise…
3 DesiPundit » Archives » A Synonym For Bell // Jun 22, 2006 at 9:51 am
[...] While the rest of the Mumbai blogosphere is busy in stoutly denying that Mumbai is a rude city [Update: except one, who says we should be proud of it], Anupam picks up the courage to admit it. [...]
4 Bombay Addict // Jun 22, 2006 at 9:57 am
Oh brilliant ! absolutely rocking ! Dude - firstly - its GREAT to meet someone who wears his Bombayite roots on his sleeve ! An honour to meet you sir ! Secondly - surely the “eloquent” in your comment on my post was in jest ? Your post is what I call eloquent and articulate. Well done ! thanks for coming over.
5 The Great Ganesha // Jun 22, 2006 at 10:25 am
bombay addict,
firstly, thank you for the compliments - they are much appreciated.
secondly, it’s an honour on this side as well. always ready to mingle with the rude and the enlightened…
and as for wearing my roots on my sleeve, well, as i’m sure you understand, it’s inevitable. the city crawls through your bloodstream like shit through the bombay sewers. you can’t escape it (i’m happy to say)!
thirdly, not much can beat the concise eloquence of “ghanta”. dude, i think my entire post can be encapsulated in that one word!
as for coming over? the pleasure was mine…
gg
6 full2faltu // Jun 22, 2006 at 10:29 am
I agree Ganseha
We don’t need a survey to certify how rude we are. I hope the “Reader Digest” people did a different survey depening on the city.
I have bombay in my heart and that is all that matters because at the end of the day, i would be a bombayite then showing a false face to everyone.
Punds
7 The Great Ganesha // Jun 22, 2006 at 10:40 am
thanks punds. being familiar with your writing though, i’m not surprised you said that…you are *definitely* a bombayite…
8 Confused // Jun 22, 2006 at 11:55 am
Ha!
I wish people would realize that his survey was not to find out which is the most rude city but the very opposite, to see which the is the most courteous. Bombay/Mumbai is the least courteous of the lot which is not the same as it being the most rude.
After that, what do I say to statements like ”New York, where ambition, greed and the desire for #1 takes priority over anything else” Accha, if it is so bad why do you love the fact that Mumbai is going the same way?
But then, I guess no reasoning works where parochialism holds sway….
9 The Great Ganesha // Jun 22, 2006 at 3:26 pm
hey confused,
firstly, whether you want to call bombay the “least courteous” or new york, the “least rude” - isn’t it still saying the same thing? bombayites are basically the least polite (most rude?) people in the world. it’s just a matter of semantics, or i guess political correctness. wouldn’t you agree?
and also, i never said that ambition, greed and desire are bad things. in fact, i would like to think that bombay being the next new york is a good thing. i’m currently based in the nyc metro area and don’t get me wrong: new york is a great city, too. but bombay, well, that is home.
as for the charge of parochialism, i stand guilty as charged. please take this post with a pinch of salt. i’ve filed it under ‘rants’ and that is, essentially, what it is. i even admit to going overboard in the last para…
thanks for dropping by, though. always appreciate a good does of valid cricitism.
gg
10 Confused // Jun 22, 2006 at 4:31 pm
Hi,
The first point, since you asked me that on my blog too, I will clarify my comment there. Soon.
The charge of being parochial. The point I was trying to make was that we all are our proud of cities we have lived in. There is nothing wrong with it. However, why should we defend everything? For example, I am a Delhite and all my female friends who have moved to Mumbai/Pune for jobs never tire of telling me how much safer they feel there compared to Delhi. It makes me sad but its true. Should I claim otherwise just because Delhi will always occupy a special place in my heart?
For me, this survey was more about India than Bombay. Despite all my love for Delhi, I have no doubt that It would fare much worse in any such comparison with Mumbai.
cheers
11 rockwatching // Jun 23, 2006 at 1:07 pm
I feel your pain brother. dont take it so hard. My parents just went to India and they found the people to be most sincere and likeable. Just because some wolf plasters a grin on his face doesn’t mean he is smiling. Next point, yes you are right, by whose standards are they judging other cultures?
12 mutiny // Jun 23, 2006 at 3:22 pm
The rudest city in India is Delhi. I have been to Bombay only on short official visits, I have always found the city’s people to be very polite and helpful.
13 The Great Ganesha // Jun 23, 2006 at 7:58 pm
@confused
more than anything this was a rant against the so-called double standard of the “cultured manners” of the midwest. i agree that every city has its drawbacks, whatever they be. however, this one in particular bothered me enough to write something about it. and i’ve also had discussions about this with friends in the past (esp when i was in wisconsin). what can i say? i guess this time, it was personal!
will drop by your site to check out your clarification…
@rockwatching
thanks for the support. i guess coming from a gemologist, that makes it rock solid? sorry, couldn’t resist!
@mutiny
i have to say that my (somewhat limited) experiences with delhi have been ok. although i always got irritated with slow pace of life there. that’s a personal thing, though. and i know things have changed considerably since the last time i was there…thanks for dropping by, though…
14 Al-Hakim // Jun 24, 2006 at 2:53 pm
Actually, I think non-New Yorkers are slightly jaded in their opinion of New York and its social customs. There is no City quite like New York where so many people, buildings and nature or the lack thereof are stacked on top of each other. So a non-New Yorker’s opinion of the City can only be compared to a neigborhood and lifestyle which is not as dense in population or matter.
Nor have so many different cultures been forced to live among each other in an organized and tolerant way since Al-Andulus. I guess my point for saying so is that the reason New York would be #1 is because of the conditions, whereas in Bombay the population is significantly less diversified which means the people are basically discourteous to their own. Which is… eh really bad.
Wasalaam.
15 mutiny // Jun 25, 2006 at 6:38 am
I don’t think anyone in Delhi likes Delhi. It’s not the case with Bombay, people from there are usually more passionate about the place. If Delhi was judged the rudest place, we wouldn’t have seen such an uproar.
16 The Great Ganesha // Jun 25, 2006 at 10:00 am
@al-hakim
if you see my response to confused’s comment, you will see that i am currently based in the nyc metro area and have been so for the past several years. i love new york it’s a great city, nicely diversified as well (i am here, after all). but i think you’re missing the point of the whole post.
as to your comment:
are you implying that residents of the big apple are more courteous to each other because they are from different cultural and ethnic backgrounds? that’s an interesting theory.
as for bombay being less-diversified, well, i think you need to visit the city or, at the very least, read about it a little before posting. if you mean less diversified than nyc, then i would agree. but that wasn’t the point of the post. your statements implicitly agree with the survey and - if you read the post properly - you would see that that is exactly what i have a problem with.
thanks for dropping by, however.
@mutiny
i think what you’re saying explains confused’s response to the article…
cheers,
great ganesha
17 Al-Hakim // Jun 25, 2006 at 10:24 am
Perhaps… it was presumptuous to make a conclusion based on citings from a blog article. My apologies…
Wasalaam.
18 TheGreatGujju // Jun 27, 2006 at 2:54 pm
There’s no doubt that the white folks misunderstand Bombay, and there’s no doubt that the survey was half-assed! What’s really amusing about this whole scene is to see the way that people are expressing their indignance about this stupid survey - which, mind you, everyone agrees is preposterous.
That said, I’m a die hard Bombayite (NOT Mumbaikar - eat shit sainiks!!) turned New Yorker - and I can definitely say that both are cities, and both have their own distinct cultures. Perhaps you need to fight your way around alfa and wrestle for your space at VT, but it’s a survival tactic. We don’t have the billions of dollars being invested in infrastructure (although we should have), or the overflow of educated people like NYC does - we have VERY limited resources and have been given, at most times because of corruption, the short end of the stick. But that has prompted amongst us an emotional connection. We’ve learned to bond in times of adversity (which Indian doesn’t bitch about how the government totally fucked us over e.g, 26/7, bomb blasts), and that is extremely commendable.
But at the same time, that is not “courteous” - and granted, given the cities they surveyed were randomly picked - we would appear to be ‘discourteous.’ Call me a forever optimist, but I’m happy it’s reached a level where it’s being compared to the likes of New York, London and Paris.
As for manners being hypocritical - I think both cultures have more than their share of hypocrisy - and that’s another post all in itself!
19 The Great Ganesha // Jun 28, 2006 at 5:33 pm
@al-hakim,
no harm done. keep stopping by… your perspective is different and therefore, more interesting than the usual passers-by.
@great gujju
firstly, i’m glad that i could amuse you. entertainment was my primary goal for the post. catharsis was the second. so i was not comparing cultures (although i’m glad you did), but was merely trying to point out a certain double-standard in judging one culture from the values of another. a trait which, i have to say, is universal to all cultures.
other than that, the reasons you pointed out for bombayites behaving they way they do, are, in my opinion, totally valid. and, as for manners, well that was my rant against the midwest. have nothing against manners, per se, just they way midwesterners use them. but i agree hypocrisy is universal.
thanks for stopping by.
cheers,
great ganesha
20 A Friend // Jun 29, 2006 at 3:30 pm
I agree with you that there is no room for traditional politeness in a city of 20 million mofu’s. Politeness goes way beyond saying please, thank you and holding doors open. Politeness is a poor measure of a city. To measure the worth of a city one should look more at how people behave towards one another in a trying time. Do they help each other or start looting? Do they protect each other or turn on their neighbors? And above all, Reader’s Digest can go fuck itself, it is nothing more than a potty-paper.
Aamchi Mumbai Mahaan!!!
21 chaiwallah // Jul 7, 2006 at 10:19 am
ganapati-ji,
reading through the posts on this topic, i came across quite a few mentions of new york. no offense, but i just dont get it. will your good self kindly explain the roots of the obsession that private-school educated, elite (and i’m sure they’re in the minority) bombayites have for new york ? the one thing i always hear from bombayites is “man, bombay is the new york of india yaar - its rockin’.” i’m quite certain (i could be wrong), that most of the city is too busy living life to really give a damn whether they are compared to new yorkers or not.
22 The Great Ganesha // Jul 7, 2006 at 12:23 pm
chaiwallah saab,
that is an excellent question. one, in fact, that is ideal for discussion over a nice cup of tea.
firstly (just to get it out of my system), i prefer to think of new york as the bombay of the us. just a minor point and a personal preference, but one that needed to be clarified.
that being said, i agree that certainly the private-school educated elite have quite a preference for new york, but let us not restrict ourselves to this small minority of the indian population. a simple walk down any busy new york street will show you the number of newpaper vendors that are indian, a cab ride will show you the number of cabbies that are indian, and so on… surely you would agree that these are not private-school educated desis. if they are, they’re probably performing some kind of thought experiment (i hope)…
my point is that, new york attracts everyone, from all walks of life, and not only from india. it is certainly the most diverse city on the planet today. and the reason is simple: it is the cultural, commercial and financial capital of the us, for sure. and, i would even go so far as to say, the world. it is, quite simply, the center of the known universe.
ok, a little hyperbole there, but you get the gist, i hope…
23 chaiwallah // Jul 7, 2006 at 1:04 pm
interesting factoid about nyc cabbies:
“The most common countries of origin are Pakistan (14.4%), Bangladesh (13.6%) and India
(10.2%).”
http://www.schallerconsult.com/taxi/taxifb.pdf
speaking of thought experiments, one of my former colleagues (a private school educated desi) drove a cab in nyc for a few years to help finance his masters degree at NYU. i come across a number of cabbies doing the same thing in chicago.
24 tgfi // Jul 9, 2006 at 8:42 pm
ekdum jhakkas this post was.
25 srinivas // Aug 28, 2006 at 12:50 am
I must say, these comments are heartning …Iam a true Bombayite..yup I still call it bombay …and Iam proud that the city gave me all the things a great city has to give to the people who live there.Despite so many adversities,disparity and lawlessness..his in still the greatest city that has emerged in the indian sub-continent and is no doubt a perfect example of how life changes if taken few risks…see bollywood..all the captains of the industry ..all have made their fortune and career from this GREAT BOMBAY….I will always be a bombayite..and an Indian next in true sense….I LOVE BOMBAY…though I live in chicago.
26 The Great Ganesha // Aug 28, 2006 at 5:54 pm
@srinivas: great to hear from a fellow bombayite. yes, BOMBAYite. i’m with you on that one. i share your enthusiasm, dude. as they say - you can take the man out of the city, but you can’t take the city out of the man! keep on truckin’ - in chicago or wherever else life takes you. - gg
27 Ami // Sep 9, 2006 at 9:51 am
Hey Ganesha,
Well said. I’m actually a journalist working in Bombay and I’m trying to do story on how a lot of people still insist on calling the city Bombay — even though it’s been almost a decade since the official name change. Basically, a story on how and why the city will never be Mumbai to you and what Bombay reprsents which Mumbai doesn’t. It would be great if I could hear from you and know what you think. Thanks, Ami
28 upamanyu // Nov 9, 2006 at 5:32 am
The Reader’s Digest survey was simply impossible to digest. Mumbai, rudest city in the world. nope, s’thing’s gotta be wrong. so i decided to flip the pages of the magazine to see how exactly the guys went about the job. and they did weird stuff such as checking whether people were thanking them or opening doors. all i can say is that that ain’t a way of conducting surveys.
bombay has a heart. and a much larger one than nyc.
i’ve lived in bombay for a mere 3 years, but i wouldn’t dream of living anywhere else. and there’s something too cool for words about bombay.
most foreigners should try there hand at travelling on the virar fast or kalyan slow. there’s no getting away from the fact that comfort level is minimal, and a minimum amount of jostling is essential. but it’s 100% reliable. you are sure to get to your destination in 1 piece. without getting murdered or knived. and in the morning, ask the bombayite which train uv gotta take from where, and he’ll take out time to direct you to the platform. try that on the nyc subway. new yorkers will simply curse you under their breath and catch their train. on the subway train it gets even worse. abusive graffiti greets you aboard the train. at least in bombay people don’t do stuff like that, eh.
remove bombay off the map of india and half our GDP will go along with it. bombay is the lifeline of india.
from my experience here, i’ve learnt one thing. bombayites help others when they are in need and move on with life. if you are truly lost, they’ll direct you. but they won’t open the door if both your hands are intact. monsoon 2005?? in my opinion, that’s fair enough. after all it’s a city on the move, and so are the people.
bombay has experienced communal riots in 93, not to add the 7/11 blasts. but the city’s always managed to get a grip on itself. it has not treaded along the path that ahmedabad chose to take, has it?? nope. people go to office, live together, work together. if some nutters decide to break a mosque or two, bombayites do not descend to the level of smashing a temple. and vice-versa.
so there you go. bombay is a city on the move. a dynamic, cosmopolitain, 24 hour city. it’s where dreams b’come reality. i hope that if you’ve not been to bombaiyya yet, you’ll visit it s’time.
29 The Great Ganesha // Nov 11, 2006 at 8:43 pm
upmanyu: i’m glad to see that you are a converted bombayite. believe me, once a bombayite, always a bombayite. it’s a city that creeps into your veins like cockroaches in a colaba flat… it’s great!
30 Kaustubh Kulkarni // Mar 31, 2007 at 11:05 am
BOMBAY IS TRULY THE NYC OF INDIA & iT IS MOVING & IMOROVING VERY FAST……i can guarantee this since i live here……people in india from other cities r jealous of Bombay & so keep cribbing abt slums etc…(i hve nothing against other cities i respect each one of them but this is a bitter fact)..They should b proud that a great city like bombay is in india but rather for emotional reasons they r not…they dont think like indians & believe facts….what a pity…i know that Delhi is a great city & full respect to d capital but fact is that Bombay is d commercial,financial,bussiness,entertainment & media capital of India & i hope that indians keep emotions aside & accept facts because it is hurting to see someone who deserves credit not getting it…. What i wnt to know frm u is that what is Bombay’s image in NYC & how far is Bombay famous there in U.S……….
31 The Great Ganesha // Apr 1, 2007 at 6:31 pm
kaustubh: thanks for dropping by - great to hear from a fellow bombayite. i hear you about the rest of india and nyc suffers a similar fate here in the us. unfortunately, much as i love it, bombay is not on the world scene as of yet. i think we still have a ways to go although recently, i would say that we are definitely heading there. while most people have heard about bombay few people know more than that it is in india. and americans in general are not really interested in anything much outside their borders, which might also explain their atrocious knowledge of geography…
32 Ranjan Nair // May 7, 2007 at 7:41 pm
This survey is based on American ideals and is an unfair judgement to the great city of Mumbai. In the US, a city is polite if its people say words like “hello”, “please”, and “thank you”. Just because the residents of Mumbai don’t incorporate such vocabulary, it doesn’t mean they aren’t polite.
In its own way, Mumbai is a polite and helpful city. The city teaches people to mind your own business, to work hard to put food on the table, and how to achieve some respect. If you don’t MYOB in Mumbai, you’re punched and disgraced. If you don’t work hard, you’ll be living in the slums in about a month. If you obey these Bombay guidelines, you earn respect and you survive.
Also, Mumbai is one of the most helpful cities. Once, a car spinned out of control and hit a light pole. The nearby crowd rushed to the driver’s aid and immediately helped him get out of the car and into an ambulance. When a fire broke out, the people didn’t run, but instead did their level best to help put it out.
The people of Mumbai also has civil sense and logic. People spend wisely and achieve tasks in the best and easiest way.
This survey of Reader’s Digest is conceited and absurd. As a Mumbai-ite, I will ignore this email, calm any angry fellow towsppeople, and get on with my life.
33 johan // Sep 26, 2008 at 4:57 am
*unnecessary expletive removed* -GG
accept the fact, we’re staying in the most disgusting, filthy and rudest city ever heard of.
dont come up with bullcrap like ‘oh, after the flood i was helped byt this this, or oh after riots so and so’
understand that even animals help each otehr in times of crisis. we’re humans, learn humanity first, and learn to help in normal times, that will distinguish you.
*another unnecessary expletive removed* -GG
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